The weird and the wild, from the unwitting wife.

My husband is a rockstar. Rather, he was a rockstar. In the early 2000s, he and his band toured all over Europe with hit songs, screaming fans, and merch for days. The band eventually broke up and he moved to the US where he’d been living in relative obscurity, composing…

Yeah, yeah, I know. Not ALL men.

Blonde woman with black corset holding her breasts
Photo by Alexander Krivitskiy from Pexels

In 2002, I was 26, living in a new city, and losing my mind trying to find a job. It was a very quick trip down the ego Slip n’ Slide from looking for teaching jobs one day, down to hoping to fold t-shirts for a few hours a week…

Take it from an ex-pat who made all the mistakes.

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You’re not just a tourist, you’re a cool tourist. You want to travel to Italy, but not be immediately perceived as a foreigner. We should probably start with your footwear, but that’s another post. I get you. In fact, I was you. Before moving to Italy full-time four years ago…

The Holy Grail ain’t made of silicone.

A woman’s hand and tattooed wrist with middle finger extended. On the tip of the middle finger is a menstrual cup.
Photo by Cliff Booth from Pexels

As far back as I can remember, I was told that getting a period would be a horrible, horrible drag. It would be painful, messy, and embarrassing, but worst of all for a muddy little twerp like me, it was going to stop me from running roughshod over the neighborhood…

The people have spoken.

A couple about to kiss. There is a woman hovering over a man with their faces very close in a passionate moment.
Photo by Artem Everest on Unsplash

I don’t ordinarily think that I am the right person to give relationship advice since I’ve broken up with enough men in my life to crew a frigate. However, in this case, I feel that it’s my civic duty to share what I’ve learned.

See, I wrote an article recently…

And not a carb in the bunch.

Large yellow mansion perched on a cliff overlooking an inlet on the sea near Portofino. There are many small boats moored and mountains can be seen in the distance.
Photo by Kristine Tanne on Unsplash

I have lived in Italy for almost four years, which is enough time to get beyond the typical American kind of shock and awe in the land of linguini. …

Where were you when I needed you, Sallie Mae?

Girl holding a surfboard and wearing a bikini, looking nervous.
Photo by Jonathan Borba on Unsplash

How is it that no one ever mentioned to me that it was even possible to end up with $180,000 in student loan debt? It seems weird to me now that this very not minor detail would have been overlooked when I was warned about so many other common catastrophes…

An incomplete list, but ya gotta start somewhere.

Photo by Eugene Chystiakov on Unsplash

In case you missed it, men are having kind of a hard time right now. Don’t hate me for this, but I empathize. I’m sure no man in his right mind wants to be unfairly lumped in with the riot of ya-hoos out there trying their darndest to ruin everything…

Come on now, let’s get it together.

Woman wearing a dress on the bow of a yacht holding a large bouquet of balloons.
Photo by Jonathan Borba on Unsplash

Welcome to the inevitable. Let’s just say we all made it to a particular kind of club where the membership criteria are nice and loose. All you have to do is age. Pretty cool, right? Except, it doesn’t seem that we are excited about this new phase. …

I blame the punks and the goombas.

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I grew up in a state full of punks with an attitude problem. I’m not going to tell you which one because I don’t want to hear all the current residents with the same attitude problem complain that I am generalizing. …

Jill Francis

Ex-pat in Italy with too many degrees in Psychology. I write about everything I’m afraid of.

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